Oh hello! My name is Tom Crapper. I didn't invent the toilet, but I sure wish I did. Here's another crappy moment in history. In 1912, the Titanic floated its way across the Atlantic, only to discover that it didn't have enough toilet paper for the voyage. "Captain Smith, you're needed on the bridge!" "I'm not coming out until someone gets me some toilet paper! Hello? Anyone? Spare a square?!"